It occurred to me the other day that I have been training consistently with weights for over twenty years now. And during this time I can count the amount of training partners that I’ve had on one hand. Now you might think that as someone who trains people in the gym and online for a living, that I would have had multiply training partners over the past two decades. But I like to think that I’m loyal to the people I train with and therefore don’t just jump into a training relationship with just anyone. As is the case with dating, I believe that there should be a certain criteria that a person looks for when seeking out a good Training Partner.
But what exactly should that criteria be?
The Bad Training Partner
Before we divulge and dissect the qualities and attributes that make up a good Training Partner, I think we should first cover as to what makes a bad Training Partner, so that we know of the things and people to eliminate from our precious workouts.
The Talker – I absolutely hate small talk. And I hate it even more while I’m training! When I go to the gym, I go to the gym to train, NOT TO TALK! Sure, I might say a quick hello or give a friendly wave if I see a regular at the gym in passing. However my earphones remain ON at all times! I don’t even talk to my Training Partner until after the workout has been complete. I understand that this might seem cold and a bit jerky, however I take my workouts serious because I want results. And results don’t happen by getting into long drawn out conversations about the everyday stresses of life in between sets. If you find yourself stuck with a Training Partner who can’t shut up during the workout and just train, then my suggestion is to just dump his or her ass and look for someone new. I understand that this might sound a bit rash, however if your workouts are suffering because of an abundance of talking and time wasting, then ultimately your results will suffer as well.
The Texter – I’ve said it before and I’ll probably say it a thousand more times – A CELLPHONE HAS NO PLACE IN A REAL, INTENSE WORKOUT!
Now, I know what you might be thinking – I’m a hypocrite. If you follow me on Instagram, then you’ll see that I put up numerous videos and photos of myself training at the gym. However in my defence, my training partner snaps these videos and photos while she’s waiting for me to finish my set so that she can go next. We don’t talk about the perfect angle or take time chatting about what type of photo might work best. We catch the shot in the moment and move on. Also, because I work in the fitness industry, I use these photos and videos to market both myself and my company. I can promise you with 100% assurance, that if I was not a Personal Trainer / Online Coach, you would never see a single photo or video of me in the gym (unless it was in the background of one of those morons take a selfie in the squat rack).
If you find yourself training with someone who is constantly cruising through Instagram or updating their status on Facebook, DURING your workout, then it’s time to block their ass from your training sessions and move on!
The Complainer – Look, nobody likes a complainer. And I’m not suggesting that your Training Partner has to be a happy-go-lucky person 24 hours a day. However, if the person who you’ve opted to train with is constantly complaining about the exercises that you’re doing, or their injuries, or just life in general, it can become a really negative experience for you both. And working out and exercising should be a positive experience, not a negative one. You can be serious lifter and a positive person at the same time. And if you’re counterpart has difficulty being both, then it might be time to go your separate ways (in the gym at least).
The Good Training Partner
So now that we know what to look for in order to avoid a bad Training Partner, what should we look for when looking for a good Training Partner?
Well, I can only speak for myself so I will tell you the attributes and qualities that I look for when committing myself to a workout relationship with a Training Parter.
1) Dedicated – I want to train with someone who is just as dedicated to their workouts as I am to mine. Knowing that my Training Partner is dedicated to achieving his or her goals, will only motivate me to remain dedicated to my own. Dedication also shows a level of commitment and accountability that your Training Partner will be there waiting for you at the gym, which can be extremely beneficial for the times that you don’t even want to workout.
2) Respectful – Time truly is the most valued commodity. And therefore I don’t want to waste it. I respect my Training Partner’s time and I know that if we’re a good fit, that he or she will respect mine as well. If we make an appointment to train at a specific time, then I won’t break that appointment as it would be disrespectful to the training relationship that we have. And if you cannot respect the person you are training with, then why are you even training with that person?
3) Goal-Oriented – I like to surround myself on a daily basis with people who are goal-oriented. And not just in health and fitness, but in business, family and financial wealth as well. Ambition is one of the most attractive qualities a person can have in my opinion. Constantly being around someone who is driven to achieve success, only pushes me harder both inside and outside of the gym. Training with someone who is “okay” with sleep walking though their workouts will only create a very lackluster and uninspiring session for me. In which case, I would rather just train on my own.
4) Hard Worker – I’ve had both male and female Training Partners over the years. And I have to say that regardless of what gender the person was, they were all hard workers. I don’t like to associate with lazy people. These people just bring me down and make me become lazy myself. And the gym is the last place where a person should be lazy! So quite simply, if someone is not a hard worker in life, then I don’t want them in my workout.
5) Motivational – As a Trainer myself, I understand how important it is to work with someone who motivates you to push beyond your limits and achieve your personal best. This is something that I’ve always practiced at excelling at, as it’s my job to ensure that my clients do everything they possibly can to accomplish their health and fitness goals. And a little motivation can go a long way for the times when someone is feeling down, stressed or uncertain about themselves. A good Training Partner knows when to push your buttons and when to back off. When you’re tired, a good Training Partner will provide you with that extra ounce of energy needed by keeping you focused on the task at hand. A good Training Partner will not only motivate you to train harder, but will also inspire you to do better. Both actions of which are needed if you ever want to achieve results with both your physique and your health.
At the end of the day, whether you enjoy training with a friend or prefer to train on your own is a choice and decision that is ultimately up for you to make. For the majority of our clients, they will only train with us. Regardless of whether you train solo, with a partner, or with a Personal Trainer, the most important thing is that you are getting the absolute most out of your training session. Because the reality is, if you’re not. then your truly just wasting your time and your results.
Yours in Good Health,
Nick Cosgrove
Forever Fit Performance