I don’t know if it’s because the holiday season is amongst us which can be stressful for many people or if it’s because of the weather change here in Vancouver, but something has definitely crawled up a few peoples’ butts this week. I’ve never heard so many people bitch and complain to me about the most insignificant of issues. Ofcourse none of our lives are perfect and we can always find ways to focus on the negatives while ignoring the positives but lately it seems as if I can’t go anywhere without hearing someone whine and fuss about something.

As a personal trainer and small business owner I’m use to hearing people complain. Whether it be about their jobs, their relationships or the workout I’m giving them, listening to people grumble and groan comes with the territory of this profession. And as such, I’ve learned to accept this. What I can’t accept though is when people’s negativity starts to effect others around them, including myself. I consider myself to be a fairly happy and positive person for the most part. Sure, I get angry and annoyed at times but rarely do my family, friends and clients ever see this side of me. As difficult as it may be at certain times, I’ve always tried my best to control my emotions, especially when in a professional setting. I don’t air my dirty laundry for the world to hear about on Social Media nor do I post videos online of shaming or putting others down just to make myself feel better. I really do believe that we are a product of our own environment. Therefore why would I ever want to turn my environment into a place of negativity and despair?

As we become older we realize there are things that we can change and things that we cannot. What I find amusing though is that the things that most of us can change are the very same things that most of us complain about. For example, when someone complains to be about their career or the people that they work with, my first question to them is why don’t they just quit and find a new job. The answer I receive is usually just brushed off and the topic is changed immediately. I often wonder if this is because the person who is complaining realizes that they only have themselves to blame for remaining at a job they hate. Or perhaps they know that the job they do have is really not that bad and if they think about it, they know that they’re lucky to have it.

The same can be said when I hear someone complain to me about their physique. When someone tells me that they “can’t” lose weight all I hear is that they don’t really want to lose weight. Because unless the person has a specific health problem or an issue with their thyroid then they CAN lose weight. Most of my clients know better then to complain to me when they hit a plateau with their training or their fitness goals because they know I will call them on it. I’m brutally honest with all of our clients and never sugar coat anything. If they want the results then they know they have to work for them. If they don’t achieve the results they want then they know they only have themselves to blame because I give each and every training session and group class I teach 110% effort every single time.

So what’s my point? Well for one, if you know you’re bitching then stop! Nobody likes a complainer. I for one like to surround myself with people who inspire and motivate me to be a dedicated athlete, a smarter businessman and most importantly, a better person. I like to work with individuals that challenge me on a regular basis both mentally and physically. If I see someone training hard in the gym then it motivates me to train harder. If I hear of someone working a 12 hour work day then it inspires me to work a 13 hour work day.

One of the most influential and inspiring people that I ever had the pleasure of knowing was my late Stepfather (who I considered to be my real father) Ronald Palm. Ron was a retired police officer turned Private Investigator. He had been shot, stabbed and verbally abused throughout his entire career while working for the VPD. When he finally retired he was so physically beat up that he had to have both of his hips replaced from all the abuse his body took over the course of his career. And even after all of this and I never heard him once say a negative word about a single person he ever interacted with or had to arrest. Ron was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer a few years ago. Throughout his entire battle I never heard him complain once. In fact, he rarely even seemed down or depressed even though he knew he was dying. He lived every day to it’s absolute fullest and only focused on the positives of his time left and didn’t waste a single ounce of energy dwelling on the negatives.

As one of the people I respected most on this planet I choose to live my life just as Ron lived his – Focused on the good, Forgetting about the bad and Flourishing in a future of being happy, content and grateful for the things I do have and for the people who support and love me.

Yours in Good Health,

Nick Cosgrove